Tuesday, August 05, 2008

How Complicated We Make Things

So she's going to be out tonight. And I don't get to come to bed until she invites me in. Do I
  1. Not mention anything and just hang around the living room until she gets back
  2. Not mention anything and just go to bed
  3. Not mention anything and sleep on the floor until she arrives
  4. Say something casual like, 'Should I wait up for you?'
  5. Say something explicit like 'May I go to bed before you arrive?'

Numbers 2 and 3 seem manipulative to me, so they're out.

Number 5 risks the "rolling her eyes and 'give it a rest'" type reaction. But it also is the honest explicit question, and does give her the opportunity to say "Yes" or "No" clearly, and gives me the opportunity to submit to whichever she says (which I know would be "yes" and I'd be disappointed - that's my challenge).

Number 1 seems the worst - no opportunity for her to 'disappoint' me by saying 'Yes, go to bed', but no opportunity to say that this is not a game and we're actually doing something. The cowards way out, I think.

Number 4 is the low-risk way of asking. But I think too "low risk" - if she says "Nah, don't bother" then I have no idea if she's acknowledging this WLM power exchange thing or not.

So after writing all this, I'm leaning towards number 5. Stay tuned.

In other news, last night she let me rub her feet. Yippee. It was very fun. She was reading and we were talking (philosophy of science, if you must know). Not kinky, not excessively "subby" as she likes to put it. Just fun. I did let her know that I would enjoy doing this any time. I was stunned when she asked. No time limit, just as long as she wanted. I forget what she said when she was done, but it was nice being in the space where I would have just gone on doing that.

Oh, and she asked me what I wanted for my birthday. In the past, I've always fantasized about something kinky - being denied sex for a few weeks and orgasm as birth present, or a chastity belt, or getting pegged, etc. Knowing that this could never ever happen. Now that it could, I was kind of speechless. I don't have a specific "stuff" that I want, but I don't know what kind of "kink" I'd ask for if she felt she wanted to give it to me as a present. I did acknowledge this to her. Still don't know what, if anything I'll ask for.

Life is good.


Anonymous said...

Jamie - why not a combination of 4 and 5, something like, "I may I go to bed before you get home if that's OK, or would you prefer me to wait up for you".

Kathy said...

While I don't know what the right answer is for you, I like my man awake when I come home.

No matter how late I stay out with friends, John is always there to greet me with a smile and a kiss.

I love the idea of coming home tired, kicking my shoes off, and having John there to listen to the events of the evening.

Coming home to a sleeping man is like coming home alone.

Love, Mistress Kathy

Mr. Manhers said...

I'd have gone with #4, from the sounds of it.

Susan's Pet said...

I would take number 4.

However, whichever alternative, I like Mistress Kathy's response. In a way, I would anticipate her needs, and just try to do the right thing.

Of course, you would know whether she does or does not really care. If she does not care, I would just go to sleep.