No deep thoughts, just an anecdote:
I mentioned in "Tip-toeing" that my beloved presented me with a necklace as a virtual chastity device. We haven't talked much about it beyond agreeing that it means what it used to mean, which is that I can't masturbate with it on, and I can't take it off; she has to do that. It was a brief, all to telegraphic conversation to be really satisfying, but infinitely better than nothing - sometimes I feel like a prisoner struggling for a glimpse of sky.
I decided to test this theory today as she was giving me a haircut, and asked if I could not wear the necklace this evening. She responded "Why?" and I said, "Well, if it means what it used to mean, I have some activity I'd like to engage in." She said "OK," but I suggested that "it would work better" if she removed the necklace and put it on again. So she took it off. My, how heavy it felt. As she left, she said, "Have a nice shower" with a little wink.
I decided to wait - she's out tonight. Our conversation would have been a little longer had my sister-in-law not driven in to the driveway - bad timing! But I'm glad we talked about it at least a very little anyway. I'll take my pleasure after doing an errand or two and getting thoroughly "lathered up" surfing the net.
And I don't know how the necklace is going to get back on; most likely I'll have to ask her, which will be OK.
In the meanwhile, I'm running an errand for a female friend of hers (who is not a particular favorite of mine - my beloved called in an off-hand manner just after she left and asked if I would). And doing a couple of things around the house that I hope she'll notice.
I'm probably not very good at this, but so help me I'm going to try to get this to work this time.
For reasons I'll try to remember to explain soon, the old Chris Williamson song "You can know all I am" is running through my head.
1 week ago