There's something incredibly erotic to me about rituals and formulas - being made to say something or ask for something. So it's funny that the going to bed ritual we've adopted does not involve my asking to go to bed, but just waiting until it's convenient for my beloved to review my performance for the day.
Which she doesn't, really. More like asks me how the day went, which is not very satisfying. The discussion is good, and is the only reason I had the link to WhippedIntoShape's solitary blog entry up for so long: the discussion (and the one we have when I arrive home from work and wait for her pleasure) doesn't end until she decides that it ends.
That in and of it self is rather satisfying.
But I can't help but want some ritual or formula around it. My fantasy of having to ask her if I can come to bed, or being required to refer to it as "her" bed, or including a phrase in my response to "how was your day?" (her preferred and my least preferred opening to this conversation), like "I served you by...". I could of course do this myself, but it she doesn't care, I don't.
The simplistic formulation is that it's all about what she wants, but of course it's really all about her wanting something that will reinforce the reality of my service to her in our relationship in my mind, which in reality may or may not be what she wants.
I think we'll get places on this, though a combination of my asking for what I need, and my being really really patient and not pushing stuff. But that's hard.
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